Dear Sisters,
I have five adult children. I just found out that I am pregnant. I have not told my husband, but I know he would want this baby. However, I truly do not know what I want to do. What would you do if you were in my situation?
Jena: I would get a second opinion, and a third opinion and a fourth opinion. And if all of those came back positive, then I would get a fifth. But I wouldn't be able to drink it because of the pregnancy.
Michele: JUMP! Off of the bed that is--like I should have in the first place. In all seriousness, I would take a deep breath and examine my choices. I personally would share this with my husband, but that too is a personal choice. My train of thought is that you got into this together, why not deal with it together?
Elana: I wouldn't have it. But then again, my tubes are tied.
Monday, November 20, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Christmas Dilemma
Dear Sisters,
I have a sister who seems to think Christmas is definitely a time for giving gifts. She thinks that no matter what your situation is you should be able to do so. My sister says that even if you go to the dollar store that as long as you are giving it doesn't matter. On the one hand I think that it is nice if you can give gifts, but I prefer life and love overall. Besides this is a day of celebration--know what I mean! What do you think?
Jena: Christmas is the day we celebrate the birth of Christ—nothing more, nothing less. How one chooses to celebrate that wondrous event is a personal decision. However, I do find it is sad that the custom of gift giving at Christmas has diminished to a level where some feel it is an obligation rather than an expression of good will. I think it sad that some have moved to the point where the value of a one-dollar gift given in the true spirit of love is unequal to an expensive gift given in the true spirit of love.
Michele: Athough we know Christmas time is the celebration the birth of Christ, some of us tend to think of it as a season for giving presents when it should be gifts. By gifts, I mean symbols of life and love. I say this because with all of the gifts I receive they do not amount to joy of seeing my family alive and well, bringing me joy and laughter. When all of my friends and family are gone I feel so empty, even though the presents are still there.
Elana: Christmas is about love and family. But, if you can give non-stressfully that too is nice. But if you can't give having love and being with your family should be more than enough.
I have a sister who seems to think Christmas is definitely a time for giving gifts. She thinks that no matter what your situation is you should be able to do so. My sister says that even if you go to the dollar store that as long as you are giving it doesn't matter. On the one hand I think that it is nice if you can give gifts, but I prefer life and love overall. Besides this is a day of celebration--know what I mean! What do you think?
Jena: Christmas is the day we celebrate the birth of Christ—nothing more, nothing less. How one chooses to celebrate that wondrous event is a personal decision. However, I do find it is sad that the custom of gift giving at Christmas has diminished to a level where some feel it is an obligation rather than an expression of good will. I think it sad that some have moved to the point where the value of a one-dollar gift given in the true spirit of love is unequal to an expensive gift given in the true spirit of love.
Michele: Athough we know Christmas time is the celebration the birth of Christ, some of us tend to think of it as a season for giving presents when it should be gifts. By gifts, I mean symbols of life and love. I say this because with all of the gifts I receive they do not amount to joy of seeing my family alive and well, bringing me joy and laughter. When all of my friends and family are gone I feel so empty, even though the presents are still there.
Elana: Christmas is about love and family. But, if you can give non-stressfully that too is nice. But if you can't give having love and being with your family should be more than enough.
Friday, November 17, 2006
Friends, Always and ...
Dear Sisters,
My best friend is pregnant and considering an abortion. If she has an abortion, I do not believe I can continue our friendship. She already has two children and can barely take care of them, so I understand why she would not want another child. I think she should consider adoption. I have two children and am barely making it or I would take the child myself. My friend knows how I feel but says she has to do what is best for her. We have been friends since kindergarten. Am I wrong for feeling the way I do?
Jena: You are not wrong for feeling the way you do, but what has that got to do with it? Your friend needs your support—whichever way she decides. One more thing, I'm not clear on why you won't take the child--run that by me one more time.
Michele: Your friend has a choice to make and she has to live with it. You have a choice to make and you too will have to live with it.
Elana: Ditto
My best friend is pregnant and considering an abortion. If she has an abortion, I do not believe I can continue our friendship. She already has two children and can barely take care of them, so I understand why she would not want another child. I think she should consider adoption. I have two children and am barely making it or I would take the child myself. My friend knows how I feel but says she has to do what is best for her. We have been friends since kindergarten. Am I wrong for feeling the way I do?
Jena: You are not wrong for feeling the way you do, but what has that got to do with it? Your friend needs your support—whichever way she decides. One more thing, I'm not clear on why you won't take the child--run that by me one more time.
Michele: Your friend has a choice to make and she has to live with it. You have a choice to make and you too will have to live with it.
Elana: Ditto
Am I or Am I Not?
Dear Sisters,
I have been married for almost fourteen years and I love my husband very much. I have this lady friend who I have known for only a few months. I am scared to death because the feelings and thoughts I am having for this woman are much like those I have for my husband. I have never had these feelings for a woman. I do not know what these feelings are but they are consuming my thoughts. What I should do?
Jena: My guess is that your fear is that you are a homosexual. Although your thoughts and feelings are mimicking homosexuality they are likely something else. Hopefully, this is just a lingering for something you need, yet are not getting from your husband. If you were gay, these feelings would probably have shown up a longtime ago. I recommend you seek the advice of your clergy, a mental health professional, and/or a relationship counselor.
Michelle: I agree with my sis that if you were really gay these feelings would have shown up a longtime ago. I would not think you are really homosexual, but then there is the possibility you have been repressing your sexuality. I really have no idea, but I do think you need to seek assistance from a professional before things get out of hand. You do not say if this lady friend is gay, but if she is you are really playing with fire. If she is not, you could lose a friend, your husband and your mind if you let these feelings fester.
Elana: This is just way out of my realm of expertise honey. If I were in your shoes, I imagine I would be pretty scared too.
I have been married for almost fourteen years and I love my husband very much. I have this lady friend who I have known for only a few months. I am scared to death because the feelings and thoughts I am having for this woman are much like those I have for my husband. I have never had these feelings for a woman. I do not know what these feelings are but they are consuming my thoughts. What I should do?
Jena: My guess is that your fear is that you are a homosexual. Although your thoughts and feelings are mimicking homosexuality they are likely something else. Hopefully, this is just a lingering for something you need, yet are not getting from your husband. If you were gay, these feelings would probably have shown up a longtime ago. I recommend you seek the advice of your clergy, a mental health professional, and/or a relationship counselor.
Michelle: I agree with my sis that if you were really gay these feelings would have shown up a longtime ago. I would not think you are really homosexual, but then there is the possibility you have been repressing your sexuality. I really have no idea, but I do think you need to seek assistance from a professional before things get out of hand. You do not say if this lady friend is gay, but if she is you are really playing with fire. If she is not, you could lose a friend, your husband and your mind if you let these feelings fester.
Elana: This is just way out of my realm of expertise honey. If I were in your shoes, I imagine I would be pretty scared too.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Torn Into Pieces
Dear Sisters,
I think I am in love with more than one man. Is this possible?
Jena: Well, exactly how many pieces are we talking about? Are we talking two or are we talking five or six?
Michelle: I think you can love more than one man at a time, but I don't think you can truly be in love with more than one. Sometimes we confuse love for another man with dissappointment in the one we really love. That doesn't mean we are really in love with the one we're with, we just wish we were in love with someone other than the one who hurt us.
Elana: Clearly we don't have enough information about this situation. But based on my own experience, I believe you can be in love with at least two or three at one time.
I think I am in love with more than one man. Is this possible?
Jena: Well, exactly how many pieces are we talking about? Are we talking two or are we talking five or six?
Michelle: I think you can love more than one man at a time, but I don't think you can truly be in love with more than one. Sometimes we confuse love for another man with dissappointment in the one we really love. That doesn't mean we are really in love with the one we're with, we just wish we were in love with someone other than the one who hurt us.
Elana: Clearly we don't have enough information about this situation. But based on my own experience, I believe you can be in love with at least two or three at one time.
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Advice Adversaries
Dear Sisters,
There are these folks in my office who are addicted to your advice column. They read the questions and argue about which one of you is right all week long. It is really getting kind of crazy. Do you have any advice for us? By the way, I am one of these folks.
Jena: The Jerry Springer Show is always looking for some really good knockdown, drag-it-out brawls.
Michele: I would suggest that you start visiting other parts of our SisterPlay.com site. There are certainly less antagonizing—although just as interesting.
Elana: Everyone is entitled to their own opinion—just play nice.
There are these folks in my office who are addicted to your advice column. They read the questions and argue about which one of you is right all week long. It is really getting kind of crazy. Do you have any advice for us? By the way, I am one of these folks.
Jena: The Jerry Springer Show is always looking for some really good knockdown, drag-it-out brawls.
Michele: I would suggest that you start visiting other parts of our SisterPlay.com site. There are certainly less antagonizing—although just as interesting.
Elana: Everyone is entitled to their own opinion—just play nice.
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